Yes…you read the headline correctly. Being unceremoniously sprung on the entire EU population from July this year will be the delightfully named Intelligent Speed Assist function. Essentially your car will beep at you if you exceed the speed limit by even 1 mile per hour. Think about the beep that you get when you don’t wear your seatbelt, that’s what you’re going to get if you hit 31 in a 30. Sure, you’ll be able to log into your car’s computer and turn it off but what percentage of people are going to do that? Low.
How will my car know how fast it’s going?
Good question. It will use the onboard GPS and also read the speed signs on the road ahead.
So everyone in the car park will be physically limited to 5mph?
Yes they will.
Won’t that be horrifically annoying and cause road rage?
100% definitely!
What’s going to happen if I hit 71mph when driving over the mountain road?
Your new car is going to make the most horrific racket until you slow down to 70 again.
Wow…well, at least it can’t get any worse?
Don’t speak too soon. Phase 2 of Intelligent Speed Assist will allow your car to actually apply its own brakes to slow you down. The regulations already ask manufacturers to activate this but it’s not mandatory at the roll out phase so some manufacturers will fit that and some won’t. But don’t be under any illusion, that is coming next.
You could be forgiven for having picked up a negative tone from this article regarding the ISA. Motors.im is not advocating for people to exceed the speed limits. That’s not our complaint. Our issue is that this is going to be very annoying in certain situations such as big empty car parks (where no-one drives anywhere near 5mph) or our Island’s unique status of having no official speed limit on certain roads, where safety dictates. If every new car is automatically limited to 70mph then we have a national speed limit and it’s as simple as that!
It’s even worse than that…you’ll be able to turn it off so it’s actually completely useless because anyone who wants to speed still can. It's just going to be really annoying. Just like that utterly ridiculous feature that stalls the car every time you stop.
I’ve driven on the Isle of Man for 25 years and I can say this from experience...Most people speed to a small degree when they feel it’s safe to do so. Most people are going to find this feature both incredibly annoying and very condescending. We’re all a bunch of dangerous driving dummies who can’t be trusted, apparently.
Didn’t the UK leave the EU?
Hahahahaha!
Rant over...for now.
